Tuesday, December 14, 2010

Like-Ability, the Essence of Trust by Sheri Geyer

Regardless of our vocation, family, socio-economic status, abilities, talents, education etc., wisdom can provide us with an uncommon advantage in establishing authentic and lasting relationships. These relationships are to operate in two directions, vertically toward God and horizontally toward man.

It is said that it takes about two minutes to form a first impression and that it takes approximately 20 exposures of a "good" impression to "undo" a bad first impression.

Research repeatedly confirms that our messages are interpreted by others in the following breakdown: 55% is by our facial expression and body language; 38% is based on our voice tone, pitch, volume and variation. Only about 7% of our persuasion power is determined by our literal words. Put all this together and you have the "like-ability" factor.

Like-ability alone is not enough. While it may land you the job, client, project or promotion you desire, without competence it can be short-lived. The uncommon advantage results from a dynamic combination of like-ability and personal competence and is sure to thrust you forward!  Like cream, people with the right combination of attitude and skill always rise to the top.

There is a process to promotion or achievement in life. It requires gaining experience and knowledge and learning from our mistakes. Accompanied with the attitude of remaining open to learning as we gain skill sets along the way, we can emerge with a tenacity that gives us the courage to impact our sphere of influence like no other.

The beginning of true wisdom according to Scripture, is found in the fear [reverence] of the Lord. This wisdom can instruct us to learn that the ability to access greatness is through serving others and embracing life's reversals and contradictions by holding fast to this "fear of the Lord" with a hope that He will guide us on the pathway to our own vantage point.

In leaning into this "wisdom", we find God's favor. With this favor, key people connect with us and are inclined to trust us. This ability comes from managing personal and interpersonal skills. Personal skills are expressed through three characteristics: self-awareness, personal responsibility, and sustained motivation. Interpersonal skills are characterized by empathy and the ability to connect.

We never learn from experience that we don't own the responsibility in. The moment we take personal responsibility for our situations and problems and redirect our emotions to more productive activities, is the moment that we step closer to the solutions we desire.

We benefit from the wisdom to connect with people and seek to understand the impact their personal struggles have on their lives. Another important interpersonal skill is the ability to build bridges of influence through trust. It is one thing to be able to read people's feelings, and another to know how to create an environment so they feel safe and can trust you. We are powerless to influence others without the ability to build trust.Respect accompanied by trust will equate to commitment. This is true in business, marriage, parenting and any other significant partnerships. Without respect people will not care what you say. Without trust they won't listen, even if they believe what you are talking about. Without both respect and trust, gaining significant commitment in virtually an impossibility.

The moment we determine that what we are doing isn't working, we can take the initiative to adjust it, thus, the essence of personal responsibility. And finally, the power of sustained motivation comes from consistent effort.

Explore your options and enjoy the journey!

Sheri Geyer is a "Simple Wisdom for Life" Coach, Mentor, Writer, Wife & Mom

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