What Arguing Over a Hamburger Can Teach
You About Forgiveness
by Joyce Meyer
Years ago, I made the mistake of asking my husband, Dave, for the last bite of his hamburger. For most of us, giving someone that last bite is more of a sacrifice than the first bite-because you still have so much left! But that last bite... I didn't realize before how much of a test it could be, especially for Dave.Our exchange began as usual, with his offer, "I'm going to stop here and get a hamburger. Do you want one?"
"No, no, no. I don't want anything."
"Are you sure you don't want anything? Let me get you one."
I firmly said, "Dave, I don't want a hamburger."
He said, "I'll eat what's left."
I said, "I do not want a hamburger."
"Ok."
He bought a hamburger, and it smelled so good. I waited and waited, trying my best not to ask for a bite of that hamburger. But he got down to the last bite, and I couldn't stand it.
I asked, "Do you suppose I could have that last bite?"
Dave got upset with me and huffed, "Why didn't you let me get you a hamburger?! I'll buy you all the hamburgers you want. Why do you only want to eat mine?"
"It's only one bite!" I defended. "You don't have to be so selfish!"
He said, "All right! Here it is."
I said, "Nope, I don't want it! I wouldn't eat that hamburger now! You couldn't pay me to eat that bite of hamburger!"
He said, "You eat this!"
I said, "I'm not eating it!"
He said, "You eat it!"
I said, "I will not!"
"Well, I'm not eating it," Dave replied, "so you might as well." So I took it, shoved it in my mouth and chewed it up.
Needless to say, I was upset. But not just because Dave had hurt my feelings, but also because I'd compared the way he treated me to the way I saw other men treat their wives. I said, "Well, other men give their wives bites of their food. I just ask you for one stinkin' bite of your hamburger and you throw a fit!" I was mad for about an hour after that argument.
What God Said About My Pity Party
It takes a little while for the Lord to get through to us when we're enjoying our vengeance and self-pity, just as I was. But finally, I started feeling the Lord deep within me saying, "Joyce, you are acting ridiculous. The man told you he would buy you a whole sack of hamburgers if you wanted them."
Dave had offered to buy me a hamburger even if I wanted just one bite of it. He'd clearly asked me in advance not to ask for his. It doesn't matter what other men do. Sharing that last bite of hamburger bothered Dave. The person to whom you are comparing your spouse probably has some faults your spouse doesn't have that would drive you crazy and be just as difficult to accept. What's the sense in pushing something on your spouse if it bothers them? Just don't do it.
Loving Means Trusting
Any relationship isn't as healthy as it could be when people hold on to little things that have hurt or offended them. It's difficult to completely open yourself up after being hurt because you're afraid you'll be hurt again. Nobody can promise that loving someone won't hurt. In fact, you can't love without being willing to be hurt. It's not possible.
You can't have real love unless you're willing to forgive. Love keeps giving the other person another chance. Love keeps trusting them over and over again, expecting them to do the right thing the next time. I realize there are big hurts as well as little things we deal with daily, but love covers it all.
Choosing to Let Go of the Past
Sometimes we may not even know what is agitating us, but we need to decide to let go of its irritating hold on us. Ask the Lord to reveal what it was that caused you to feel bitterness or resentment. You may be surprised at what He brings up, but when you see the truth, decide to let go of that grief. Decide to forgive the person who didn't respond to you in the right way.
It took me several days to completely get over the hamburger incident. That's the truth! My feelings had been hurt because Dave didn't want me to have that bite of his hamburger. But I had to get over it and move on.
One word: DAN
ReplyDeleteAm disappointed that this site would post anything of Joyce Meyer's. She is a charlatan if there ever was one. Prosperity for HER -- check out her million plus dollar home, cares, etc.
ReplyDeleteI would never subscibe to her false teachings and I feel sorry for those that are taken in. Meyer has caused much pain and suffering in one of my grandchildren with her teachngs. I could say so much more. Do the research on Joyce Meyer, don't take my word, study the Bible.
Art LeBeau, Villa Ridge, MO
I have listened to Joyce Meyer for many years. I have learned from her practical application of the scriptures and I look forward to hearing and seeing her broadcasts. If she happens to be popular and God uses her let us rejoice together. If any are jealous of her success, keep on listening. If you disagree lets talk about it. Jim Murphy, Oak Pk mich
ReplyDeleteNobody is forced to listen to Joyce. My advice to "Joyce bashers" is this: My wife was a real mess when she started listening to Joyce in 1987. Both of us have been in full time ministry now since 1997, and if not for the help my wife received through Joyce, I'd be doing this alone. So what if she has a million dollar home and we don't? So what if she is driving a new car and ours is still a 1982? I don't have a problem with it, so why don't YOU get over it? I thank God that He sent someone into my wife's life to help her, and that He called us both into the ministry to help other hurting people. Does Joyce do everything perfectly? I doubt it, but you and I don't either. You know what they say, my friend, "EAT THE MEAT AND SPIT OUT THE BONES..." Listen to the WORD of the LORD, learn and be blessed by it, and get your eyes off the vessel He chooses to deliver it with. It's not about you or me, and it's not about Joyce. It's all about Jesus. If you can do a better job, then DO IT, because this messed up world needs all the help it can get.
ReplyDeleteRev. Jerry & Jenny, Life Healing Ministries
I am sure I know a little more about Joyce Meyer than the other posters as I also had a relative live next to her. I also know of many who gave everything to her and now are broke and some that worked for her are now ignored. I know of a Christian TV program that "kicked" her off for she was just in for the money and not the poor that this TV station was helping. Read the Bible and Meyer does not teach all that the Bible teaches, she selects what she wants to get her prosperity across so that she gets more money. Just think if her lifestyle is Christ like. So many are duped by this type of preaching and yes she has people such as the above posters claiming how great she is. Listen to Hank Hannegraff and do some extensive reading on these type of charlatans, don't take my word on it. At 76 yrs of age I have studied many of these so called "preachers" and their lifestyle is nothing close to what Jesus taught.
ReplyDeleteI will say she might have helped a few but she has hurt by far more and I know by what has happened in my family. Yes Jesus will judge someday, and I leave that up to Him, but Joyce Meyer is a phony -- I make no apologizes for this remark. (I am still curious as to why she wasn't aware of the character of her former bodyguard who murdered his wife and his children) Art LeBeau, Villa Ridge, MO
To make a bold verbal assault of one of God's vessels as some of the posters have, signifies their complete lack of knowledge of the scripture. The real charlatans today, are those that try and live as Christians, without the knowledge of scripture. The sad truth is, anyone that suggest that they or a family member gave all, to a ministry like Joyce Meyers, and ended up broke, alledges an indictment against God, not Joyce Meyers. As Job answered his wife in the scripture, when she encouraged him to "curse God and die". He said, " you talk like a foolish women". Job then quickly declared his unrelenting and stedfast confidence in God, when he said " though He slay me, Yet will I trust Him. So to the posters that have so quickly pronounced the final judgement on the matter, I would say to you "It is not over until it is over." Your children or relatives may be headed for the doulbe restoration that Job came into, because he did not charge God foolishly, nor did he reach out and make one of God's vessels the scape goat of his trials. Your childrens crisis is unrelated to Joyce Meyers, unless as with Aaron and Mariam, they put their mouth on one of God's annointed, in which case they were swiftly judged and would have died if it had not been for the prayers of the very man of God they were seeking to undermine. You are unwise to handle God;s annointed in this manner, and it reveals your ignorance of the Word. the scripture says plainly, "My people ARE DESTROYED FOR LACK OF KNOWLEDGE." Whether anyone likes her, Joyce Meyers is one of God's deliverers raised up in this time to proclaim liberty, healing and deliverance to a scarred generation. If she messes up, God is capable of correcting her, but he is very clear in what our duty is as a believer, God said "Touch not mine annointed, and do my prophets no harm!" These posters are not believers with knowledge of scripture, so sadly they have misquided resentment, and just as with Judas, their focus on money matters is false pretense. Judas did not care for the poor, but he used them as a smokescreen to try and hide his SELFISH AGENDA and desires that were counter purpose, to why Jesus had come to earth and what the KINGDOM of GOD WAS REALLY ABOUT. To those who made the earlier post, with the damning remarks about one of God's Generals (Joyce Meyers), you talk like foolish women. Fall in love with the Word of God, and you'll see how ignorant your comments have been, and how devoid of scriptural knowledge they really are. It is not hard to discern your lack of knowledge of the Word of God, and how counter purpose to the Kingdom of God, your desires and agenda really are. Your speech betrays you. You would do your family a great service to seek God through his Word to be able to give wisdom when they face reversals and crisis. YOU ARE PROBABLY ONE OF THE MOST INFLUENCIAL VOICES IN THEIR LIFE, AND SADLY YOU RAVE AGAINST ONE OF THE VESSELS OF GOD, AND NO DOUBT WEAKEN THEIR RESOLVE AND UNDERMINE YOUR FAMILIES CONFIDENCE IN GOD AND WEAKEN THEIR FAITH. IF YOU WOULD RECEIVE INSTRUCTION TODAY, I WOULD SAY TO YOU AS IN THE SCRIPTURE...." A VIRTUOUS WOMEN BUILDS HER HOUSE, BUT A FOOLISH WOMEN TEARS DOWN HER OWN HOUSE. GOD BLESS YOU AND LET HIS MERCY COVER YOU, UNTIL THE TRUTH FOUND IN HIS WORD, IS WHAT IS FOUND IN YOUR MOUTH.
ReplyDelete